Report on recent actions by Team Choopy, B. P. R. D. (WEST)

 

On November 12^th, 1989, the Team was tasked with a priority mission, to investigate suspicious activity centered on a family home on the EAST side of SAN JOSÉ, CALIFORNIA. The activity was reported as ‘classic POLTERGEIST behavior’ (moving furniture, sharp objects flying through the air, etc.). The Team was augmented by Fr. Graves, of the Benedictine Order and a trained exorcist. Fr. Graves was also a representative of the Archbishop of SAN JOSÉ.

 

The Team begins by interviewing the victims of the activity.

 

            LOUIS STAPLETON- A Male of around 40 years old. Married to PEGGY and father to STEPHAN and PAMELA.

            PEGGY STAPLETON- A Female of around 40 years old. Married to LOUIS and mother to STEPHAN and PAMELA.

            STEPHAN STAPLETON- A Male, 8 years old.

            PAMELA STAPLETON- A Female, 6 years old.

 

The Team learns that the family has never experienced or heard of any such activity, except in movies. The family dog is present, and showing signs of distress (whining, cowering in a corner of the room, trying to hide under the sofa). The Family reports that the activity first manifested about a week ago, on November 1^st. Items in and outside the house began to “move of their own accord”. The activity also followed STEPHEN to his school. The most concerning report was that sharpened PENCILS flew through the air. STEPHEN reports that he saw “a black pillar, that came through the wall. It had two (2) horrible red eyes. It looked at him and disappeared.” Further questioning of STEPHAN, aided by CRUNCH acting as a ‘therapy Raccoon’, elicited useful information that the black pillar came into the room from below and on a diagonal. We may be able to use the location and angle data to identify a source locus for the black pillar.

 

The Family tells us that they have seen no sign of communication from the agent of the activity, something that the movies they have seen lead them to expect. The Family tells us they lived in the same house for the last 12 years, we ask to search the family’s luggage and personal possessions. The family eagerly complies. During the search, a heavy glass ashtray ‘levitates’ (Neat-O inspects the ashtray, and does not find any evidence of fakery) and LOUIS’ key ring flies at GORDON. GORDON is struck in the arm with remarkable force.

 

We contact HQ for further information about the neighbors on either side of the STAPLETON house. The ROSE family have been contacted and have not experienced any unexplained phenomena. Mr. GRIGGS has not been contacted as yet. There was no answer to door nock or telephone calls.

 

The Team questions the children further, and after some defensive prevarication PAMELA convinces STEPHEN to tell us about the “bad words”. The children were playing with a Ouija Board that they ‘got from Mr. GRIGGS’. One notable message from the Ouija Board is that “there is a dresser that is going to ‘H E Double toothpicks’ for Christmas.” STEPHEN has been maintaining that he got the Ouija Board as a gift from Mr. GRIGGS, but eventually owns up to taking it from Mr. GRIGGS trash can.

 

The Team moves to inspect the STAPLETON house, and checks for any criminal records on the ROSE Family and Mr. GRIGGS. They all have no records. We request a title search on the three properties, and are informed that this will take at least a few days. Disruptions from the recent earthquake have negatively impacted routine inquiries of this nature.

 

The Team arrives at the STAPLETON Family home, and there meet Fr. GRAVES. He arrives in a 1958 Plymouth ‘FURY’, a not entirely inappropriate car for an exorcist.

 

The Team prepares to enter the STAPELTON Family home, choosing low profile equipment due to the essentially quiet suburban setting of the operation. GORDON seeks guidance from the SPIRIT GUIDES, and gains the assistance of SISTER SHARK (See Appendix 2 (TWO) for notes on SISTER SHARK). While most of the Team enters the house, GORDON sweeps the perimeter. GORDON notices a broken window on the basement level of the GRIGGS house, on the side facing the STAPELTON Family home. There is no sign of any effort to repair the window, or to remove the shards of glass.

 

The Team finds that the STAPELTON Family home has suffered extensive damage and petty vandalism. Food has been smeared around the walls and ceiling, perishable goods have been removed from the refrigerator and allowed to spoil and rot. Peanut Butter and Spaghetti Sauce have been used to scrawl on many surfaces many swear words and short messages expanding on the theme of “You will All DIE!!!” As we take in this scene of depravity, a throw pillow on the sofa in the family room suddenly explodes in a cloud of foam rubber dust. SISTER SHARK informs GORDON that ‘there is something bad here’.

 

The Team began to search the target facility, looking for clues or signs indicating what was causing the manifestation.

 

NIC searches the upper floor. He finds that the vandalism extends throughout the house. The bathtub has overflowed, furniture and bric-a-brac has been thoroughly thrown about, and there is a strong smell of backed up drains. He finds the Ouija Board that was taken from Mr. GRIGGS’ house.

 

CHOOPY investigates the kitchen. He finds that several spoiled steaks have been placed under the sink. While investigating further, he hears the sound of, and smells the scent of natural gas. He turns off the stove burners and oven, which turn back on as he turns away. He locates some DUCK-TAPE and various kitchen utensils and succeeds in shutting off the gas feed to the stove.

 

NEAT-O initiates a search for any invisible entities. It sprinkles cleanser in the air, in hopes of outlining any corporeal but invisible object. While engaged in this, it hears a crash from the downstairs bathroom. It investigates and finds that the commode is backing up, and the mirror and other glassware in the room have broken. It exits the room and begins to seal it off, in an attempt to prevent further soiling of the target facility.

 

VIOLET asks (I don’t remember how Violet asked this question) “Why are you here?” She helps Neat-O to secure the door to the downstairs bathroom.

 

GORDON looks around upstairs and sees that the broken window in Mr. GRIGGS’ house is somewhat aligned with the diagonal movement of the black pillar.

 

NIC begins to examine the Ouija Board, and soon gets a response from the poltergeist. The Board spells out “YOU CANNOT SAVETHEM” NIC asks a question about GORDON, to test the veracity of the Ouija Board, and gets pelted by a G. I. Joe in reply. The Ouija Board then spells out “YOUHOSRES”, which we eventually determine to be an attempt to imitate BOB MCKENZIE (Platinum Album winning TELEVISION star RICK MORANIS). It also spells out “THE PRIEST IS USELESS” (Mandy Rice-Davies applies).

 

CHOOPY continues to exploit the KITCHEN for further intelligence, and is attacked by a HOUSE PLANT, among other things. He smells and hears that the oven is once again spewing gas into the target facility. He moves down to the basement, wherein he is attacked by various balls from the pool table (Oddly, not the Eight Ball).

 

GORDON moves outside, turns off the gas to the target facility at the meter, and calls HQ to request any update on the title search for the three houses and to expedite the local utility shutting off gas to the neighborhood.

 

NIC continues to pester the Ouija Board, asking if the entity is William Fuld (“NO”), and if it is Mr. GRIGGS (“THAT FOOL IS DEAD”).

The Team decides that we have learned all we can at the STAPELTON Family home. We move on to Mr. GRIGGS’ house.

 

CRUNCH and CHOOPY begin to recce the target. Crunch reports a burnt, greasy smell ‘lingering in the air’. Choopy rapidly moves into the target, inspecting the basement for deadly sporting equipment. He finds nothing of any import.

 

The Team enters the target. In the hall is a pile of mail that has been pushed through the slot. The items on the bottom are dated around November 1^st.

 

CRUNCH determines that the cooked smell is emanating from upstairs, and begins to move there. He reports that is smells like “cooked human”. Further investigation leads to a body, burnt to ash, in the bed in the master bedroom. The right hand of the corpse is unburnt, and touching a string of beads on the bedside table.

 

NEAT-O sprays the room with HOLY WATER, and a little air freshener.

 

Fr. GRAVES says that the beads might be a rosary. He is certain that they are protective beads of some sort.

 

NIC and GORDON look around on the ground floor. They enter the DEN. GORDON inspects the bookshelves, and NIC locates a safe. NIC opens the safe, and finds several ITEMS (see annex ‘A’, Inventory of GRIGGS SAFE). Notable among the ITEMS are a ‘FLOPPY DISK’, a PASSPORT, and an AUTOMATIC PISTOL, CALIBER .45, M1911A1. GORDON removes the magazine and ensures the pistol is unloaded.

 

CRUNCH activates the computer. He searches for any DISKS in the desk, and finds the DISK from the safe. We decide that the DISK may hold useful intelligence as to the activities of Mr. GRIGGS, and CRUNCH inserts the DISK into the computer. (see PHOTOGRAPH ONE and TWO, DISK obverse and reverse).

 

When the computer activates the DISK, things begin to happen quickly. First the screen reads-

 

“Protective Spells and Charms

Copyright 1986

Pentagrams for Professionals, Inc.”

 

The next screen reads-

 

“Last Update was NEVER days ago

Press SPACEBAR to run Menu”.

 

Crunch presses the SPACEBAR, and the computer begins to fill the screen with gibberish. After several scrolling screens of gibberish, the computer begins to threaten the Team. GORDON regrets his failure to capture the screen images with his camera. Finally, the computer shows this “Error Message”.

 

“FLAGRANT SYSTEM ERROR!

Computer Over.

Demonic Infestation=Very Yes.

It is now UNSAFE to turn your computer off.” (See PHOTOGRAPH THREE, “ERROE MESSAGE”)

 

GORDON tries to call HQ from the house telephone. The line is jammed with laughter and threats. The walls start to bleed. The Team urges Fr. GRAVES to initiate his exorcism with all due haste.

 

GORDON begins to feel as if he should be in motion, and quite hungry (SISTER SHARK doesn’t do well in confined spaces where movement is restricted). He notices that the wallpaper in the hall and kitchen is peeling back to reveal more of the sort of language we have come to expect from this foul-tempered spirit.

 

NIC is still in the Den, and sees a spectral form advancing on him. He is bitten by “…a huge, shadowy, toothed, fang-y mouth.”

 

VIOLET senses the entity, and that the entire house is ‘threaded through’ with ‘evil tendrils’. She warns CRUNCH of an impending attack and aids him in eluding it.

 

NIC is once again attacked by the poltergeist. He is unable to shoot it, as other team members are down range. He evades the attack.

 

CHOOPY sprays NIC with something (See “¡¡¡Choopy’s little book of things that WORKED!!! Page 12 “¡¡Polter-Poison!!). The poltergeist recoils, and CHOOPY throws a SPIRIT LOOP, with no effect. The Poltergeist grabs NIC’s shotgun, and wrests it from his grasp.

 

CRUNCH tries to secure the shotgun and fails.

 

VIOLET tells Fr. GRAVES, who is very much in the line of fire to “runduck!” He does neither of these things, but still manages to avoid being shot by the shotgun wielding poltergeist.

 

GORDON throws his issue firearms out the window of the Den.

 

NEAT-O sprays HOLY WATER on the shotgun and the surrounding area. It follows up with a mist of adhesive, which outlines, vaguely, a tentacular shape. The shape sinks through the floor.

 

The computer is unplugged, which does not cause it to stop working. A good soaking in HOLY WATER and POLTER-POISON does bring about a total (So far anyway) cessation of function.

 

The poltergeist attacks GORDON, who dodges, and fails to strike back.

 

CHOOPY leads the way to the basement, with a fist full of SPIRIT LOOPs. His attempt to throw several at the poltergeist fails, but he notices a discolored patch on the wall.

 

The poltergeist somehow manages to possess NEAT-O, no doubt an offshoot of the computer interface that had somehow become corrupted. This warrants further study, as NEAT-O has been notably safe from all of the spiritual menaces we have faced up to now.

 

NIC places a SPIRIT LOOP on top of NEAT-O, in an attempt to control the evil entity that is battling for control of its very operating system. The SPIRIT LOOP promptly bursts into flames. NEAT-O (or the evil entity) sprays bleach from the ‘foaming cleaning agent dispensing nozzle’, NEAT-O is able to direct the flow away from NIC.

 

GORDON sees a tentacle creeping out from under the chassis of NEAT-O (HAGSTONE Mk. I) but is unable to strike it.

VIOLET is unable to see the tentacle.

NIC remains alert for further manifestations of evil, or friendly fire (whichever comes first).

 

CHOOPY and CRUNCH attempt to engage the entity in the basement. CHOOPY has several SPIRIT LOOPS, all of which combust at once. He moves closer to the discolored spot on the wall. CRUNCH sprays the air and wall with the contents of CHOOPY’s sprayer (POLTER-POISON).

 

CHOOPY digs into the wall, where the discolored patch is, and reveals a short concrete lined tunnel leading off towards the back yard of the GRIGGS house. CHOOPY burrows through another layer of drywall and enters an abandoned FALLOUT SHELTER from the early 1950’s. On the floor of the FALLOUT SHELTER is marked a PENTAGRAM OF WARDING, surrounding a book and a dagger. CHOOPY and CRUNCH report this discovery, and that a water leak in the roof of the FALLOUT SHELTER has begun to wash away parts of the PENTAGRAM.

 

NIC and VIOLET assist Fr. GRAVES in moving swiftly to the FALLOUT SHELTER. GORDON searches the kitchen and den for FLOUR or CHALK to effect repairs on the PENTAGRAM.

 

VIOLET is attacked again by the entity, without effect.

 

Fr. GRAVES determines that the book is a TOME OF DEMONIC CONTAINMENT, and has been damaged by the water seepage. He undertakes RE-CONCECRATION of the TOME, while CRUNCH retraces the PENTAGRAM using NIC’s CHINA MARKER. GORDON assists with a stick of RAILROAD CHALK from the den.

 

The TEAM acquires some tarpaulins and drop cloths from some nearby garages, and erects a protective ‘tent’ over the TOME and PENTAGRAM. The TEAM then requests technical support from HQ to complete the containment of the threat and transport to safe storage.

 

RECOMMENDATIONS:

 

The DAGGER should be immobilized inside the FALLOUT SHELTER and PENTAGRAM for transport. Filling the FALLOUT SHELTER with LUCITE would allow continued observation of the DAGGER into the future.

 

Mr. GRIGGS was a veteran of the Second World War, and served in (what ever unit was involved with the summoning of Hell Boy). He later undertook occult investigations on his own. He located the DAGGER, which had been involved in a string of brutal murders. He bought the house and had the FALLOUT SHELTER installed, in order to create a secure containment facility for the DAGGER. It is thought that the recent earthquake may have weakened the structure of the FALLOUT SHELTER, allowing the seepage that breached the integrity of the PENTAGRAM. B. P. R. D. should reach out to any other survivors of the (Hell Boy summoning) unit, and conduct an assessment as to their post war actions and if any further support is needed. Mr. GRIGGS should be accorded a military funeral, with full honors (at least in this author’s opinion).

 

PENTAGRAMS FOR PROFFESSIONALS is deserving of further scrutiny from the B. P. R. D. Their “Protective Spells and Charms” disk may (or may not) have been the means by which the poltergeist gained access to NEAT-O’s “operating system”. Even if they think they are selling a bogus product to fools and cranks, there may be some risk (or benefit) in their products being available on the open market.

 

Fr. GRAVES, while competent and qualified in his area of expertise, is not particularly suited for a dynamic tactical event such as the operation described in this report. In similar situations in future, he should be assigned an escort, and kept in a secure staging area until his talents are called for. If he had been injured during the exploration of the target houses, the TEAM would not have been able to secure the DAGGER in a timely and safe manner.

 

TEAM should carry spare radios and raid gear for a few augmentees.

 

TEAM should continue training with hand to hand weapons, as bullets are not always the solution to our problems.

 

OBSERVATIONS:

 

The TEAM continues to work well together. We each bring a variety of skills and perspectives to bear on every situation we find ourselves in, and this synergy makes the TEAM more effective than the sum of its parts.

This mission was a sharp contrast to our last, in that we were not able to employ guns to any effect. Indeed, the TEAM’s firearms became one of the greatest threats to our survival. The TEAM was able to dispose of its firearms and continue the mission with no loss of effectiveness.

 

CHOOPY’s investigative zeal was instrumental in our discovering the seat of the spectral manifestation.

 

CRUNCH showed unexpected expertise in the use of the computer. Had he not been skilled in computer use, we would have sent the disk to HQ for evaluation, with potentially catastrophic results.

 

NIC was able to quickly open the locked safe in the den, allowing the swift exploitation of the intelligence items within. He is also a constant source of useful items at odd moments.

 

VIOLET is a skilled interviewer of victims and witnesses. She helped greatly in eliciting the story of the Ouija Board from the two STAPLETON children. She also asked cogent questions during the investigation of the two houses, and conducted efficient searches.

 

NEAT-O is a constant source of effective constructive action and various liquids that help the TEAM achieve its mission with the least fuss and mess. It was able to resist any impulse to begin cleaning the STAPLETON home immediately, which was quite impressive as that place was a mess.

 

In closing, I want to say that I am proud of this team, and proud to be a member of it.

 

s/Gordon McKenzie Fairbanks

Sergeant, RCR

Agent, BPRD

Member, TEAM CHOOPY