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Choopy Cabra

Page history last edited by Michael 2 months, 1 week ago

A.K.A. Chupert A. Kabra

Species: Chupacabra or El Vampiro de Moca

Sex: Male

Origin: Mexico, outside Oaxaca

Occupation: agent with the BPRD




Once there was a normal Chupacabra, running around the Mexican hills doing normal Chupacabra things, namely eating and sleeping.




One night he found himself in a trap. Damn that tasty piece of goat. He growled and chomped at the bars. Then a bee stung him. Maybe it was a wasp. It REALLY hurt. Maybe it was something else.


When he woke up, his head hurt and as usual, hungry. As his vision cleared vertical lines told him he was still in a cage. At least this one was larger. The room stank, not with normal stinky smells, dead animals, old food, the masses of the great unwashed. Those wonderful smells meant food was near buy. This smell stung Chupy’s nose. Every time Chupy tried to bite someone, they sprayed him with a bottle full of the burny stuff. The food was ok, but for some reason it often made him take naps. Many days his whole body hurt when he woke up. Paws and head throbbed, wrapped in bandages. Once Chupy woke on a table with a mask over his face and tubes stuck in his arm. After a great battle, including several well landed bites and scratches, the wasp thing stung him again and Chupy slept.


One day, Chupy didn’t know which because there were no windows, the strange noises barked by the humans started making sense. Even stranger, other animals were making the same noises. The humans talked to the animals, and the animals talked back. Chupy’s first word was, “No”. Then the bee stung him again.


Over the next few weeks, Chupy and the other animals spent a lot of time crying. They all tried to fight at first. The moments of anger felt good. Then they didn’t. Humans dressed in white coats enjoyed being mean and laughing when the animal cowered in fear. Then something worse started. School. Day after day they forced the animals to do tricks... and READ! The horror! How...how...civilized? Horribly civilized! The human who barked the most, often throwing things around the room, was a human the othes called Doctor Van Hosen, Maximillian Von Hosen to be exact. Sometimes he treated the humans in white coats as bad as they treated the animals.




Then one day something wonderful happened. A giant red man with a tail, stubs on his head, and one great big hand, along with his fishy-looking friend, burst through the doors with a squad of men dressed in black. That day was exciting and scary. The big red guy made the day less scary. He wasn’t human. Chupy didn’t know what he was. But he spoke in soft tones. Chupy liked him. And once Big Red realized Chupy could speak, he invited Chupy to come home with him and his friends to a place called BPRD in San Francisco.


After learning to live with humans AND a whole lot of other weird and wonderful creatures, BPRD allowed Chupy some freedom inside the compound. Going outside remained forbidden. One night Chupy’s friend Bradley thought it would be fun to put Choppy on a leash. That didn’t go well at first. A few hotdogs and the promise of fresh air did the trick. Dark sunglasses covered the problem of Chupy’s bright yellow snake eyes. Bradley added a 2-way radio to Chupy’s collar in case he got lost by...er...accident? Not likely. If anyone asked what in the world this ugly-looking dog was, NOT that Chupy was ugly, Bradley always claimed Chupy was a Burmese Bat Hound. That began a wonderful year of adventures romping around San Francisco. Sometimes Chupy snuck out at night alone. There were of course reports of some, well, strange animal running around the streets of San Francisco. What else is new?




But there was another reason for skulking around at night. The now literate Chupy read every copy of the BPRD’s favorite magazine. No, not Guns & Ammo. The Weekly World News. One of this artistic journal’s favorite subjects is a bald, bug eyed, pointy-eared creature named Bat Boy. Well, Chupy wasn’t about to let this second-rate cryptid have all the glory. OK, maybe BPRD wasn’t thrilled with the idea that their newly adopted team member stepping out. Covering up Big Red’s not so subtle accidental sightings concerned them more. When frightening rowdy children out too late for their own good didn’t work, Chupy got a camera from Bradley. Staging his own photos wasn’t too hard, especially when a few of the aforementioned children were more than happy to take and star in photos. Add a few articles written in crayon, and viola, Chupy, published author! Ok, ok. It was the Weekly World News. That didn’t matter to Chupy. It did matter to Bat Boy. The war was on.

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